I was browsing the internet for eye-makeup tutorials because at my age eyelids start drooping. And, I noticed that most of the makeup tutorials out there are by young girls who don’t know what it’s like to be my age.
Then, I found Hot & Flashy, a blog for women who are perhaps experiencing hot flashes, but still want to be hot and flashy at my age.
And, I started wondering, “How in the world did I get to this stage of life?”
I’m not so sure how I feel about becoming middle-aged. What does it mean to be middle-aged?
I do know that it means that when I laugh really hard the laugh eventually turns into a deep, hacking, embarrassing cough. (You thought I was going to say that I pee a little. I do that, too.)
Hacking and coughing and peeing…but I still love to laugh.
At my age, I start wondering what it’s going to be like as an empty-nester. We’re a couple of years away, but it’s starting to feel like reality. In just two quick years, it will be my child, my only child, graduating high school. I expect to be a proud basket case.
I am my father’s daughter after all. And, at his age, you cry at every special event and when grand kids become teenagers and when you see pictures of your daughters when they were brides. And, it all started when he was my age….crying at our high school graduations.
You hope and pray your teenager stays out of trouble. You wonder what your child will be like as an adult and who she will marry, and you find yourself trying to decide what your grandparent name will be.
You realize that you’re still dreaming the same dreams you had since childhood and wonder if you’ll ever realize those dreams. Then, you start to wonder if you’re too old to have dreams, and quickly banish the thought.
At my age, you’re prone to flashes of heat that radiate from your body, making you feel like a human heating element and clothes-changing, sheet-drenching night sweats and extra weight gain around the middle. You tell yourself that having a “matronly” figure is a badge of honor, and to top it off, you suddenly find yourself wearing prescription glasses. But on the bright side, the magnifying lenses make your eyes look more “open” and the lower frame sits just across your under-eye circles, hiding them from view.
You wonder if you’ll ever be thin again and what it will be like to grow old with your spouse and if you’ll still cook dinner when it’s just the two of you…
At my age you want to broaden your horizons by learning new things; like knife cutting and how to apply eye shadow so that your droopy eyelids don’t look so, well, droopy. While you may want to camouflage your droopy eyelids, you do start to see beauty in laugh lines and crows feet; appreciating the life and the stories behind them.
You begin to realize that really, you’re just getting started.
This is life…at my age; still learning and growing and dreaming and in a sense, feeling ‘newer every day.’
See you in class,